Chapter I
Original French
Voyage d'un habitant du monde de l'étoile Sirius dans la planète de Saturne.
Dans une de ces planètes qui tournent autour de l'étoile nommée Sirius il y avait un jeune homme de beaucoup d'esprit, que j'ai eu l'honneur de connaître dans le dernier voyage qu'il fit sur notre petite fourmilière; il s'appelait Micromégas, nom qui convient fort à tous les grands. Il avait huit lieues de haut: j'entends par huit lieues, vingt-quatre mille pas géométriques de cinq pieds chacun.
Quelques géomètres, gens toujours utiles au public, prendront sur-le-champ la plume, et trouveront que, puisque M. Micromégas, habitant du pays de Sirius, a de la tête aux pieds vingt-quatre mille pas, qui font cent vingt mille pieds de roi, et que nous autres citoyens de la terre nous n'avons guère que cinq pieds, et que notre globe a neuf mille lieues de tour; ils trouveront, dis-je, qu'il faut absolument que le globe qui l'a produit ait au juste vingt-un millions six cent mille fois plus de circonférence que notre petite terre. Rien n'est plus simple et plus ordinaire dans la nature. Les états de quelques souverains d'Allemagne ou d'Italie, dont on peut faire le tour en une demi-heure, comparés à l'empire de Turquie, de Moscovie, ou de la Chine, ne sont qu'une très faible image des prodigieuses différences que la nature a mises dans tous les êtres.
La taille de son excellence étant de la hauteur que j'ai dite, tous nos sculpteurs et tous nos peintres conviendront sans peine que sa ceinture peut avoir cinquante mille pieds de roi de tour; ce qui fait une très jolie proportion. Son nez étant le tiers de son beau visage, et son beau visage étant la septième partie de la hauteur de son beau corps, il faut avouer que le nez du Sirien a six mille trois cent trente-trois pieds de roi plus une fraction; ce qui était à démontrer.
Quant à son esprit, c'est un des plus cultivés que nous ayons; il sait beaucoup de choses; il en a inventé quelques unes: il n'avait pas encore deux cent cinquante ans; et il étudiait, selon la coutume, au collège le plus célèbre de sa planète, lorsqu'il devina, par la force de son esprit, plus de cinquante propositions d'Euclide. C'est dix-huit de plus que Blaise Pascal, lequel, après en avoir deviné trente-deux en se jouant, à ce que dit sa soeur, devint depuis un géomètre assez médiocre, et un fort mauvais métaphysicien. Vers les quatre cent cinquante ans, au sortir de l'enfance, il disséqua beaucoup de ces petits insectes qui n'ont pas cent pieds de diamètre, et qui se dérobent aux microscopes ordinaires; il en composa un livre fort curieux, mais qui lui fit quelques affaires. Le muphti de son pays, grand vétillard, et fort ignorant, trouva dans son livre des propositions suspectes, malsonnantes, téméraires, hérétiques, sentant l'hérésie, et le poursuivit vivement: il s'agissait de savoir si la forme substantielle des puces de Sirius était de même nature que celle des colimaçons. Micromégas se défendit avec esprit; il mit les femmes de son côté; le procès dura deux cent vingt ans. Enfin le muphti fit condamner le livre par des jurisconsultes qui ne l'avaient pas lu, et l'auteur eut ordre de ne paraître à la cour de huit cents années.
Il ne fut que médiocrement affligé d'être banni d'une cour qui n'était remplie que de tracasseries et de petitesses. Il fit une chanson fort plaisante contre le muphti, dont celui-ci ne s'embarrassa guère; et il se mit à voyager de planète en planète, pour achever de se former l'esprit et le coeur, comme l'on dit. Ceux qui ne voyagent qu'en chaise de poste ou en berline seront sans doute étonnés des équipages de là-haut; car nous autres, sur notre petit tas de boue, nous ne concevons rien au-delà de nos usages. Notre voyageur connaissait merveilleusement les lois de la gravitation, et toutes les forces attractives et répulsives. Il s'en servait si à propos, que, tantôt à l'aide d'un rayon du soleil, tantôt par la commodité d'une comète, il allait de globe en globe lui et les siens, comme un oiseau voltige de branche en branche. Il parcourut la voie lactée en peu de temps; et je suis obligé d'avouer qu'il ne vit jamais, à travers les étoiles dont elle est semée, ce beau ciel empyrée que l'illustre vicaire Derham se vante d'avoir vu au bout de sa lunette. Ce n'est pas que je prétende que M. Derham ait mal vu, à Dieu ne plaise! mais Micromégas était sur les lieux, c'est un bon observateur, et je ne veux contredire personne. Micromégas, après avoir bien tourné, arriva dans le globe de Saturne. Quelque accoutumé qu'il fût à voir des choses nouvelles, il ne put d'abord, en voyant la petitesse du globe et de ses habitants, se défendre de ce sourire de supériorité qui échappe quelquefois aux plus sages. Car enfin Saturne n'est guère que neuf cents fois plus gros que la terre, et les citoyens de ce pays-là sont des nains qui n'ont que mille toises de haut ou environ. Il s'en moqua un peu d'abord avec ses gens, à peu près comme un musicien italien se met à rire de la musique de Lulli, quand il vient en France. Mais, comme le Sirien avait un bon esprit, il comprit bien vite qu'un être pensant peut fort bien n'être pas ridicule pour n'avoir que six mille pieds de haut. Il se familiarisa avec les Saturniens, après les avoir étonnés. Il lia une étroite amitié avec le secrétaire de l'académie de Saturne, homme de beaucoup d'esprit, qui n'avait, à la vérité, rien inventé, mais qui rendait un fort bon compte des inventions des autres, et qui fesait passablement de petits vers et de grands calculs. Je rapporterai ici, pour la satisfaction des lecteurs, une conversation singulière que Micromégas eut un jour avec M. le secrétaire.
Musean translation
Complete machine-assisted Musean translation directly from the French of all seven chapters, Beuchot edition (1829), checked against the printed pages. Later editorial notes are omitted.
Journey of an inhabitant of the world of the star Sirius to the planet Saturn.
On one of the planets that circle the star called Sirius lived a young man of considerable wit, whom I had the honor of knowing on his last visit to our little anthill. His name was Micromegas, a name well suited to all the great. He stood eight leagues tall: by eight leagues I mean twenty-four thousand geometrical paces of five feet each.
Certain geometers, people always useful to the public, will at once take up their pens and find that, since Mr. Micromegas, an inhabitant of the country of Sirius, measures twenty-four thousand paces from head to foot, making one hundred and twenty thousand royal feet, while we citizens of Earth are scarcely five feet tall, and our globe is nine thousand leagues around—they will find, I say, that the globe which produced him must necessarily have exactly twenty-one million six hundred thousand times the circumference of our little Earth. Nothing in nature could be simpler or more ordinary. The states of certain sovereigns of Germany or Italy, which one can walk around in half an hour, compared with the empire of Turkey, Muscovy, or China, offer only the faintest image of the prodigious differences nature has placed among all beings.
His Excellency being as tall as I have said, all our sculptors and painters will readily agree that his waist might measure fifty thousand royal feet around: a very handsome proportion. His nose being a third of his handsome face, and his handsome face a seventh of the height of his handsome body, we must admit that the Sirian's nose measures six thousand three hundred and thirty-three royal feet and a fraction—which was to be demonstrated.
As for his mind, it is among the most cultivated we have. He knows a great many things and has invented a few. He was not yet two hundred and fifty, and was studying, as custom required, at the most celebrated college on his planet, when by sheer force of intellect he worked out more than fifty propositions of Euclid. That is eighteen more than Blaise Pascal, who, after working out thirty-two for amusement, according to his sister, later became a rather mediocre geometer and a very bad metaphysician. Around his four hundred and fiftieth year, as he emerged from childhood, he dissected many of those little insects less than a hundred feet in diameter that elude ordinary microscopes. He made a most curious book of them, but it brought him some trouble. His country's mufti, a great quibbler and profoundly ignorant, found propositions in his book that were suspect, offensive to pious ears, rash, heretical, and savoring of heresy, and pursued him vigorously. The question was whether the substantial form of the fleas of Sirius was of the same nature as that of snails. Micromegas defended himself with wit; he won the women to his side; the lawsuit lasted two hundred and twenty years. At last the mufti had the book condemned by lawyers who had not read it, and the author was ordered not to appear at court for eight hundred years.
He was only moderately distressed to be banished from a court filled with nothing but intrigue and pettiness. He wrote a very amusing song against the mufti, who took little notice, and began traveling from planet to planet to finish educating his mind and heart, as the saying goes. Those who travel only by post chaise or carriage will doubtless be astonished at the conveyances up there; for we, on our little heap of mud, conceive of nothing beyond our own customs. Our traveler had a marvelous knowledge of the laws of gravitation and all the attractive and repulsive forces. He used them so aptly that, now with the aid of a sunbeam, now with the convenience of a comet, he and his people passed from globe to globe as a bird flits from branch to branch. He crossed the Milky Way in a short time; and I am obliged to confess that among the stars strewn through it he never saw that fine empyrean heaven which the illustrious vicar Derham boasts of having seen at the end of his telescope. Not that I mean to suggest Mr. Derham saw badly—God forbid! But Micromegas was on the spot, he is a good observer, and I wish to contradict no one. After much wandering, Micromegas reached the globe of Saturn. Accustomed as he was to new sights, he could not at first, on seeing how small the globe and its inhabitants were, suppress that smile of superiority which sometimes escapes even the wisest. After all, Saturn is scarcely nine hundred times larger than Earth, and its citizens are dwarfs only a thousand fathoms tall or thereabouts. At first he made a little fun of them with his people, much as an Italian musician laughs at Lulli's music when he comes to France. But, having a sound mind, the Sirian soon understood that a thinking being need not be ridiculous merely because he stands only six thousand feet tall. Having astonished the Saturnians, he grew familiar with them. He formed a close friendship with the secretary of the Academy of Saturn, a man of considerable wit who had, it is true, invented nothing, but gave a very good account of other people's inventions and was reasonably good at little verses and large calculations. For the reader's satisfaction, I will relate here a singular conversation Micromegas had one day with Mr. Secretary.
Plain English translation
Complete machine-assisted Plain English translation made independently and directly from the French of all seven chapters, Beuchot edition (1829), not from the Musean edition. Later editorial notes are omitted.
A resident of a planet in the Sirius system travels to Saturn.
On one of the planets orbiting the star called Sirius, there lived a very intelligent young man. I had the honor of meeting him on his last visit to our little anthill. His name was Micromegas, a name that suits all great people very well. He was eight leagues tall. By eight leagues I mean twenty-four thousand geometric paces, each five feet long.
Some mathematicians, who are always useful to the public, will immediately pick up their pens. Mr. Micromegas, from the Sirius region, measures twenty-four thousand paces from head to foot, or one hundred and twenty thousand French royal feet. We citizens of Earth are scarcely five feet tall, and our globe is nine thousand leagues around. They will therefore calculate that the globe which produced him must have a circumference exactly twenty-one million six hundred thousand times greater than our little Earth's. Nothing could be simpler or more normal in nature. The territories of some German or Italian rulers, which you can walk around in half an hour, compared with the empires of Turkey, Muscovy, or China, give only a very faint idea of the enormous differences nature has put between all beings.
Since His Excellency is as tall as I have said, all our sculptors and painters will readily agree that his waist could measure fifty thousand French royal feet around. That makes a very attractive set of proportions. His nose is a third of his handsome face, and his handsome face is a seventh of the height of his handsome body. We must therefore admit that the Sirian's nose measures six thousand three hundred and thirty-three French royal feet and a fraction. That is what we set out to prove.
As for his mind, it is one of the best educated we know. He knows a great many things and has invented a few. He was not yet two hundred and fifty and was studying, as was customary, at his planet's most famous college when he worked out more than fifty of Euclid's propositions by his own reasoning. That is eighteen more than Blaise Pascal. According to his sister, Pascal worked out thirty-two for fun, then went on to become a rather ordinary mathematician and a very bad metaphysician. At about four hundred and fifty, when he was growing out of childhood, Micromegas dissected many of the tiny insects that measure less than a hundred feet across and escape ordinary microscopes. He wrote a very interesting book about them, but it got him into trouble. His country's mufti, an extremely fussy and ignorant man, found statements in the book that were suspicious, offensive to religious ears, rash, heretical, and suggestive of heresy. He pursued the author vigorously. The issue was whether the substantial form of the fleas on Sirius was of the same nature as that of snails. Micromegas defended himself intelligently and won the women over to his side. The trial lasted two hundred and twenty years. In the end, the mufti had the book condemned by legal scholars who had not read it, and the author was ordered to stay away from court for eight hundred years.
Being banished from a court full of nothing but petty quarrels and small-minded behavior did not upset him very much. He wrote a very funny song against the mufti, who took little notice of it, and began traveling from planet to planet to complete the education of his mind and heart, as people say. Anyone who travels only in a post chaise or a carriage will no doubt be surprised by the transportation up there. On our little heap of mud, we cannot imagine anything beyond our own habits. Our traveler had an excellent knowledge of the laws of gravity and all the forces of attraction and repulsion. He used them so well that, with a sunbeam one moment and a convenient comet the next, he and his companions went from globe to globe as a bird flits from branch to branch. He crossed the Milky Way in a short time. I must admit that among its scattered stars he never saw the beautiful highest heaven that the distinguished Reverend Derham boasts of seeing at the end of his telescope. I am not suggesting that Mr. Derham saw incorrectly—God forbid! But Micromegas was there in person, he is a good observer, and I do not want to contradict anyone. After a good deal of traveling, Micromegas reached Saturn. Used as he was to new sights, he could not at first see that small globe and its small inhabitants without giving the superior smile that sometimes escapes even the wisest people. After all, Saturn is barely nine hundred times bigger than Earth, and its citizens are dwarfs only about a thousand fathoms tall. At first he and his companions made a little fun of them, much as an Italian musician laughs at Lulli's music when he comes to France. But the Sirian was sensible. He soon understood that a thinking being need not be ridiculous just because it stands only six thousand feet tall. After astonishing the Saturnians, he got to know them. He became close friends with the secretary of Saturn's academy, a very intelligent man. Admittedly, the secretary had invented nothing, but he gave a very good account of other people's inventions and was fairly good at writing short poems and making long calculations. For the reader's enjoyment, I will describe an unusual conversation that Micromegas had with Mr. Secretary one day.
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Chapter I is part of Micromegas by Voltaire. This page sets the French original beside 2 direct-source translations, so any line can be checked against the source. It is chapter 1 of 7 in the work, which is kept in the European tradition.
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